The Sight of Our Sins Afflicted Jesus
from the First Moment of His Life

Dolor meus in conspectu meo semper.
"My sorrow is continually before me."----Ps. xxxvii. 18.

I.
All the afflictions and ignominies which Jesus Christ suffered in life and death, all were
present to His mind from the first moment of His life. And He offered them all every
moment of His life in satisfaction for our sins. Our Lord revealed to one of His servants
that every sin of men gave Him during His life so much sorrow that it would have
sufficed to cause His death, if His life had not been preserved in order that He might
suffer more. Behold, O my Jesus! what gratitude hast Thou received from men, and
especially from me. Thou hast spent thirty-three years of life for my salvation, and I
have done as much as I could, as far as it depended on me, to make Thee die with
sorrow, as often as I have committed sin.

II.
St. Bernardine of Siena writes that Jesus Christ "had a particular regard to every
single sin." [---T. ii. s. 56, a. I, c. 1.] Each of our sins was present continually to our
Saviour, even from His infancy, and afflicted Him grievously. St. Thomas adds [P. 3, q.
46, a. 6.] that this one sorrow of knowing all the injury which resulted to the Father
from every sin, and all the evil which it occasioned to us, surpassed the sorrow of all
the contrite sinners that ever were, even of those who died of pure contrition; because
no sinner ever arrived at loving God and his own soul as Jesus Christ has loved the
Father and our souls.

Therefore, my Jesus, if no man ever loved me more than Thou hast done, it is only
just that I should love Thee above all men. Since, then, I can say that Thou alone hast
really loved me, so will I love Thee alone.

III.
That agony which Jesus suffered in the garden at the sight of our sins, for which He
had taken upon Himself to satisfy, He suffered from the time He was conceived in His
mother's womb. If, therefore, Jesus Christ passed a life full of tribulations for no other
reason than on account of our sins, we ought not, during our life, to afflict ourselves
for any other evils than for the sins which we have committed.

My beloved Redeemer, I could wish to die of sorrow at the thought of all the bitterness
that I have caused Thee during my life. My Love, if Thou lovest me, give me such a
sorrow as may take away my life, and so obtain for me Thy pardon, and the grace to
love Thee with all my strength. I give Thee my whole heart; and if I do not know how to
give it to Thee entirely, oh, do Thou take it Thyself, and inflame it with Thy holy love.
O Mary, advocate of the wretched, I recommend myself to thee.

Source:
THE INCARNATION, BIRTH, AND INFANCY OF JESUS CHRIST,
St. Alphonsus Liguori
Nihil Obstat and Imprimatur, 1927
Redemptorist Fathers
Traditional Roman Catholicism